Get Under The Skin Of The Mercedes-Maybach S600 Guard

Armored Car

What are the toys that make this tank different than a regular S-Class?

The vast majority of us will never have to fear for our lives. Sure, we're all going to die, but there is a difference between death by hardened arteries and dying because you caught a stray bullet. The Mercedes-Maybach S-Class Guard is the car for those who are likely to experience the latter, but its half-million dollar plus price means this isn’t the car for your neighborhood drug dealer. It’s the car for the drug cartel that supplies your dealer or for the corrupt dictator of the country that allows said cartel to operate.

In other words, this is a car for villains, but you’d have a hard time telling the difference between the S600 Guard and a standard S600. So how are the two cars different? For one, the S600 Guard is probably the only tank you can buy with a factory warranty that can be serviced at your local dealership. And when we say tank, we mean it. The car is estimated to weigh about 9,200 pounds, although Mercedes wont disclose the official number for security reasons. The weight is the only telling sign of the VR-10 rated armor (the highest attainable armor rating for cars) hiding underneath. So what aside from the heavy armor, bulletproof glass, run-flat tires, and beefed up suspension makes this car different?

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Strategic engineering is one main difference. For example, the rear seats are pushed back so that occupants sit behind the extra tough C-pillars to keep safe. Even the gas tank has a self-healing coating so that bullet holes get sealed up while the car speeds off. The rest comes from the details, like the windows that lack an automatic up function because the hydraulic motors that hoist up the heavy window lack a no-pinch function. This means that if a would-be assassin sticks their hand in through a lowered window, the armored glass could serve as a gruesome protection device. Other cool buttons include one that sounds a loud alarm and another for a fire extinguisher that puts out fires under the car.

A cabin air system is also an option against bio weapons because it seals off all outside air and supplies fresh air to valuable passengers and their faithful driver. And faithful the driver must be indeed because when ordering one of these luxury tanks, the driver is sent to a special driving school to show them how to maneuver the heavy vehicle in emergency situations as well as educate them in normal smooth driving techniques so they can truly pull off the luxury limousine feel. Pro tip: When turning the Guard at speed, the instructors encourage throttle steering instead of braking into corners since the weight makes the car steer wide and the overburdened brakes wont do much to slow the mass.

Aside from these mammoth differences, the S600 Guard is fairly similar to the standard version, although you have the option to replace the champagne refrigerator with a gun safe, a tough decision even for a world leader. Obviously Mercedes wont disclose who has bought these cars, but they can tell us that Guard variants of the S-Class have gone to 91 countries and that some buyers bulk order around 15-20 armored Mercedes. Talk about rolling deep with the squad. With the S-Class Guard, Mercedes has pulled off a neat trick by making it look like a "normal" S-Class while weighing twice as much and being safer than a bomb shelter. This is why it is the most desirable tank ever.

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