Crash

Lance Armstrong Hits Parked Car And His Girlfriend Voluntarily Takes The Blame

From world-class cyclist to loser.

Lance Armstrong once had it all but he turned out to be a cheating liar. We really don’t think it’s necessary to delve into the whole doping scandal; practically everyone knows what happened by now. Damn liar. Anyway, a new report hot off the wire claims that on the night of December 28, Armstrong and his girlfriend, Anna Hansen, were driving home from an Aspen Art Museum party. The couple was in a rented GMC Yukon when Hansen lost control on icy roads and hit some parked cars.

She claimed that Armstrong "had a little bit to drink," hence her taking the wheel. Only it was actually him who was driving. Classy guy that he is, he then let Hansen go out alone to ask for help, in the cold and in high heels. She told a man who'd rented one of the now damaged parked cars "I’m Anna, we’re the Armstrongs, my husband’s Lance, he was just driving maybe too fast around the corner or something." The police were called but "the Armstrongs" left the scene before they arrived. Detectives eventually caught up with them and Anna admitted her lie. She took the blame because the family name (or just Lance's) had been smeared enough lately, and wanted to avoid additional bad media. Too late, Anna.

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