Tesla's GigaBier Has Finally Arrived

Offbeat / Comments

And it's almost $100 for a pack of three.

Tesla is again foraying into the adult beverage space with the introduction of GigaBier. The pilsner was first introduced in 2021 by ol' Elon himself, and we assume it took the backburner to much more important projects like, say, building cars. No matter the reason, the beer is finally here, and it's "Brewed for cyborgs, made by humans."

Tesla knows its constituents love when it comes out with something out of left field. The flamethrower is always the item that gets pointed to when this comes up (even though it's technically a Boring Company product). The next is the fancy Tesla-branded tequila whose empty bottles can now be found for exorbitant sums on eBay. Now GigaBier enters the conversation, and we have no doubt every fanboy with a Model 3 and an "I love Elon" t-shirt is going to eat it up.

GigaBier Tesla

In Tesla's words, the GigaBier is "designed to emulate the form of Cybertruck while honoring the 500-year tradition of German Reinheitsgebot beermaking. Enjoy this limited edition pilsner-style beer brewed in Berlin with our exclusive strain of Cyberhops and notes of citrus, bergamot, and sweet fruit. Each bottle features a seamless gloss black sleeve with a glow-in-the-dark Giga watermark. Prost!"

The beer, which sells for a pretty hefty €89 ($97), comes in a pack of three for the price. The bottle looks kind of, sort of like a Cybertruck maybe if you squint, but we would have probably recommended stainless steel for the bottle material for obvious reasons. Regardless, it looks sleek, and the glow-in-the-dark Giga logo is a neat party trick.

As for the taste, who knows; it's a 5% abv beer and it uses "Cyberhops". If the tequila reviews are anything to go off of, we assume the beer will be decent at best, and not worth the price, but maybe it will surprise buyers.

GigaBier Tesla

The kicker is it's being sold by Tesla Europe, so unfortunately, US buyers aren't able to purchase it, at least for the time being.

What we do know is that the beer will most likely be a low-volume seller by design, potentially like the Cybertruck. It's no secret distance makes the heart grow fonder, and by creating an attractive product in low numbers with a high price, we're sure that GigaBier will be a huge hit and sell out very quickly.

The fact is, people who love Tesla eat this stuff up and the company knows this. If Tesla could hear our pleas, we recommend it stop producing gimmicky side-show pieces and instead focus a little more on what kinds of gimmicky side-show pieces it puts into its cars.

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